My heart has been heavy, and my mind has been full trying to process COVID and social unrest and the election. Then fire season descended upon Napa far earlier than usual, and my mind went into a tailspin.
I sat in silence after reading this poem. Tears stung my eyes. Then, I slowly reread the poem, stopping on this line:
Try corralling a lightning bolt, containing a tornado.
It’s a line that makes you want to laugh because it sounds so outrageous, yet it’s often how we approach life, especially in hard and uncertain times. We know it’s impossible to corral a lightning bolt, but we’d rather try than sit with our feelings and our racing mind.
Today I needed this reminder. When life feels like it’s falling apart, that’s the time to allow, bear the truth, and let go. Because I am ready to be carried to higher ground.
This Instagram message from Glennon Doyle stopped me mid-scroll:
I don’t think of myself as an artist. I have trouble calling myself a writer, even though I’ve been paid to write for my entire career. I’ve always called myself something else — like a reporter or journalist or marketer or content creator.
But I’m exploring how to own the label of “writer,” and doing it while sheltering-in-place has been so much harder than I thought it would be. Like millions of others, when I heard we had to shelter in place, my striving mind switched into overdrive. I thought I’d finish a million home improvement projects, and start churning out blogs and social media content for The Land of Woo.
Instead, I’m still struggling with the blog’s look and feel, my social media efforts are non-existent, and I’m not posting nearly as much as I’d like to be.
I love Glennon’s IG post because I’m reading her book, Untamed, and these words came directly from a writer who is openly admitting that she is struggling right now.
She hasn’t written a word.
And she shares this comment:
Please don’t forget that the Not Creating is a crucial part of the Creating. We are in a cocoon time and in there- the only work to be done is: surrender. Please be relentlessly tender with yourself.
Glennon Doyle
It’s not that I want to stop creating altogether. It’s that I wanted someone to tell me it was ok to create at a caterpillar’s pace. Now I feel more at peace, knowing that this slow becoming is part of the process of creating.
As I continue my journey into the land of #Woo, I’m studying how to expand my mind and improve health. I’m also studying my actions and reassessing the impact my consumption has on society and the earth.
For a long time, I dabbled with the idea of launching a blog on Conscious Closeting, exploring how to build a more sustainable, earth-friendly, lower-waste wardrobe. One of the people I immediately began following was minimalism expert Courtney Carver.
Courtney started down her path to minimalism in 2006 after she was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Over time, she realized she didn’t have to be defined by M.S. She decided to “choose what foods I put in my body, what treatments I take, who I spent time with, who is on my medical team, and how I view my life and the world.”
This week marks the 10th anniversary of Be More with Less, and today Courtney shared 10 lessons she has learned from a decade of blogging. I won’t repeat all 10 lessons — please read her entire blog. Below are the three lessons that stood out for me, and let me know I’m on the right path:
#1 Courtney’s Lesson: Consistency matters more than intensity. I have to work on myself every day. Feeling calm and centered doesn’t come naturally. I over react when I want to under react. I hold on when I mean to let go. In between all the lovely parts are messy parts. Sometimes I think I’ve got it all together but unless I’m intentionally focused, I’m all over the place. …. Consistency matters more than intensity.
My take: Thank you, thank you, thank you for saying this! Some days I feel like an absolute mess, and I question why I think I’m qualified to write this blog. On other days, I get an idea that I’m so excited about I can’t wait to write. We all know success never comes in a straight line, and life is messy. I need to remind myself of this constantly — it’s the consistent little steps I take that will keep me moving forward.
#2 Courtney’s Lesson: You can get started before you know what you are doing. Never wait until you think you know it all or until you think you have it all figured out because when you start, you usually discover that you really don’t know what you need to know and the only way to know is by starting, stumbling and discovering what really matters.
My take: I waited too long to start this blog because I didn’t think I knew what I was doing or had enough “expertise” in the area of #Woo. Honestly, I let fear hold me back from launching. I finally realized I just needed to do it — just publish that very first blog. It was the most amazing feeling to launch this blog and realize yes, I can do this. It is not perfect, but it “is.”
#3 Courtney’s Lesson: Working harder is not the answer. Movement without stillness becomes burnout. Rest, recover and be kind to yourself as you find your way in work and in life. Leave the keeping up and catching up behind. Don’t be afraid to walk away and give things room to unfold as you remind yourself that everything will be ok even if it feels like things are falling apart. As Wallace Stevens said, “sometimes the truth depends on a walk around the lake.”
My take: This is why I love my 2020 New Year’s Resolution: Non-striving. When I work too hard and strive too much, the wheels fall off. My health gets worse; my mood suffers; my work deteriorates. That’s when I remind myself that this year is all about non-striving. I take some deep breaths, look at the sky, go for a walk, make some iced tea, or meditate. Only then does my energy start to return, and my stress begin to ease.
Thank you, Courtney, for your blog. It’s the inspiration I was seeking today, and the #Woo made sure to send your message my way.
P.S. And if an idea is really meant to live in the world, it will. Journalist Elizabeth L. Cline published the book The Conscious Closet in 2019 on how to build a more sustainable closet. I read it. You should, too.
