What a #Woo week it’s been!
This week did not start off on a high note. I’ve been having trouble writing. This Coronavirus situation is only getting worse (as I write this, it has just reached pandemic status). And even though I am doing my Kegels, my backache hasn’t disappeared. So I turned to Louise Hay’s Heal Your Body guide to see what she had to say about lower back pain:
Fear of Money. Lack of financial support.
Well, damn. Why does Louise have to be spot on?
Money is ALWAYS a trigger for me. It’s even more of a trigger now because I’m in a state of transition. I’ve cut back on my work so I can figure out my next step professionally, but I still judge myself by how much money I make. I know I will make less this year. My husband knows I will make less. But accepting that — instead of being extraordinarily grateful to the Universe that I can do that — has been super hard for me.
To top it off, I am failing at my attempts to practice non-striving. I cannot stop pushing myself to come up with a clear cut strategy for living my best life. Do I want to pursue writing? Do I want to get a meditation degree or certification? Do I want to look into yoga teacher training? I’ve been so distracted by this tug-of-war that I can’t write.
But this week, the Universe showed me it had my back.
Ever since I read Sheri Salata’s book, The Beautiful No, I’ve been listening to the Sheri + Nancy Show podcast. I feel like Sheri and Nancy have become my friends and a valuable source of support. (Ok, yes. That sounds a little creepy.)
But this week’s podcast blew me away. Sheri and Nancy interviewed author Jen Pastiloff. Before yesterday, I’d never heard of Jen. But as of today, she has changed my life.
As I learned about Jen’s life, it sounded amazing. She leads retreats for women all across the globe! She’s a yoga instructor! She’s written a best selling book!
And. She’s. Deaf.
BOOM!
My heart stopped when I heard that. My eyes filled with tears. I had to place a hand on my heart. I’ve been dealing with hearing loss for a decade, and I have let it stop me from living my dreams. In the past few years, I have slowly started to beat back my depression and regain a sense of self through therapy, meditation, the teachings of Abraham Hicks, the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza, and the support of my husband.
But hearing that Jen — this fabulous, accomplished, inspirational woman — was deaf felt life-changing. There are so many people I look up to in The Land of Woo. But I have yet to meet one who is deaf. You cannot be what you cannot see, and hearing Jen’s story allowed me to finally see myself living a dream life.
My path forward has become a bit more clear. I feel as if I have a soul sister supporting me in this Universe. Perhaps a whole tribe. Listening to that podcast, I felt genuinely complete — and that is something I haven’t felt in a very long time.